to be moved to tears at the thought of His beauty, to find myself frustrated for not loving Him enough, to know such great peace that the world could never give.
How funny is this? The greatest conflict I faced all year has crumbled to nothing almost immediately as I gave it up to Him. To get to a point where I was able to say...
"God. What can I do without You. What a mess I make of life every time! I don't know what to do, I don't know if I'll make it. But I'd like the courage to give up the world and just learn to love You more. Take it all away, so that I can cling to You and make You my only priority."
And when I was ready to choose Him before anything the world may give... His blessings poured out. How GREAT my God is. I was at my lowest - even in the worldliest standards I prided myself on. I was nothing... Yet He placed me in the best places, in the most perfect place I could have wished for.
He gives when we are ready to receive.
The whole of me knows that I have done nothing to get to where I am. I am humbled and grateful. And I feel motivated to try all this differently. To not fear Man, but to fear God. To not please Man, but to please God. I feel bolder, and courageous in making mistakes - because I know these are all lessons God has planned for me to learn. I have seen how strangely, and wonderfully He works in my life. How he knows me better than I know myself... All things within Him are Good.
To find myself falling in love with this majestic being all over again is the most blissful thing in my life.
And I think if things had not turned out exactly the way it did, I would not be able to say that GOD is the greatest blessing in my life.
in Him we have strength.
And I am reflecting on this today:
But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. (2 Corinthians 12:9)